Love is so much more than a feeling, more than emotion or chemical-processes, or ‘all the right things’ said or done.
Love is hearing someone through to the end of what they’re saying. When I can accept the voice within me saying ‘but! he’s criticizing you! are you going to take that?’ When I can ask ‘what was your aim in saying that? was it criticism or not?’ Because sometimes the aim is unexpected… sometimes the words don’t come out right and the intention is good, and the words can be viewed from a non-critical perspective. Maybe I was thinking with a negative lens, and there are happier interpretations. Being able to love myself, I can see that I am worthy of kindness, and also see where I can accept well-intentioned criticism as a sign pointing to where I may need to grow, and as knowledge about what my partner feels and needs.
Love is so much more than romance, which fades to dust by the end of the day or week or hormone surge. Love lasts; despite working through emotional baggage, illnesses, or economic stresses. Love helps some of us overpower feelings of inadequacy, to be more than we thought we could. To find what makes up our selves and become stronger people. To focus more on what nourishes our souls rather than cookie-cutter actions perceived as special to some. Why should my partner buy me chocolates if sugar makes me cranky, or scatter rose petals if I’m allergic to the pesticides sprayed on commercial roses? What if I delight in a home-cooked meal and a cuddle? What if I’m ill and need rest more than romance? Love soothes the burn of hurt pride and expectations.
Love, as stated in the Christian Bible, is patient, is kind, and never fails- where ‘never fails’ refers to the love continuing to be present, even when individuals actions are less than perfect. Our actions may fail, and real love continues anyway.
As the wheel of the year turns, (I am so excited for Imbolc, which has become my favorite holiday, sacred to my patron goddess Brigid!) I can see the steadiness of the Divine, partnership of balance for our universe, ever-present. While the Earth seems to sleep, miracle processes take place which heal and make whole our bodies and the larger body which we rest on. Goddess and God are always with us; healing, making whole, so that we can dance and sing the wonder of the Divine for the rest of the year- doing loving actions at every turn so that the healing process will be easier next year. This is our goal; to improve our actions continually, to facilitate healing for ourselves and the world.
Blessed be, my dear soul-friends. May healing and love be with you always. <3 Brigid Diana